From “All or Nothing” to Lasting Success: Embracing Core Values

If you consider yourself an “all or nothing” person, and you want the cycle of motivation followed by “throwing in the towel” to stop, this is for you.

I wanna share a story with you that I have not shared with many people.

To start, here is a broad overview of my present circumstances:

Own my own coaching business.

Happily married.

2 beautiful, healthy kids.

Corner lot 4 bedroom house in the suburbs with an inground pool.

Have built a life where my wife was able to resign from her career to spend more time with our kids.

I tell this NOT to brag, but to articulate the results I have achieved over the last 10 years of consistent work on my craft and on myself. It is more than I ever thought I could have achieved.

Rewind to 2009.

I was 19 years old. I didn’t go to college. I was unloading trucks for $8/hour with no plan in place or idea of what my future held.

I had never had a serious girlfriend, and went through all of high school without going on one date or even kissing a girl. Get your laughs out now.

At the time, I hated my job but had no idea of what to do instead.

One day, while unloading trucks outside in 98 degree weather, 2 younger kids I recognized from high school pulled up in a new BMW.

At the time, I was cruising in a 1990 Toyota that didn’t even go in reverse … .I had to stick my foot out the door and Fred Flintstone my way out of a parking spot if I couldn’t pull through.

Anyway, they saw me and we started talking.

When I asked what they were up to nowadays, they told me they were both in college but also selling drugs on the side.

They then described to me how they were making “so much fuckin money.”

Not only were they making money, but also were in college and working towards degrees and careers.

Me? I was 2 years older than them and making $8/hour with no plan or path.

That’s when they made me an offer.

They told me how easy it was to make money dealing drugs and how I could easily start working with them.

It was a way out of my situation.

It wasn’t sustainable or by any means a good long term plan.

It was dangerous, and most importantly it was not aligned with my core values or beliefs.

But, what other options did I have? I didn’t have any backup plan and this would be a quick way to get some fast money and then I could figure it out from there right?

What would you have chosen?

What do you think I chose?

I said “No thanks, I’m good.”

I turned it down.

Why?

Growing up, I had seen first hand what addiction could do to families.

I also had 2 younger brothers I wanted to set a good example for.

To be honest though, at the moment, none of these thoughts went through my head. It was just an automatic “no”.

Over the next 5 years I went through 5 different dead end jobs making no more than $10-$12/hour.

It wasn’t until 2014 when I got certified as a personal trainer and started my career.

And it took me 2 years for that to be a decent income.

Then 6 more years to get to where I am now.

It was at this job that I met the girl who would become my wife and give me 2 beautiful children.

But I didn’t foresee any of this coming in 2009 when I said no to dealing drugs.

I simply stuck to my core values.

This is why I have my clients establish their core values on day 1 of my coaching program.

When you are aligned with your core values, saying no to “quick fixes”, fad diets, and damaging fat loss programs is easy to do even when you feel that your path isn’t moving “fast” enough.

Being “all or nothing” is likely not aligned with your core values as a person.

You are not “all or nothing” with work, your kids, your significant other, your friends, etc.

However, with nutrition, why do you abandon your core values?

Because you are unsure.

You are unsure of what to do and this makes you vulnerable to predatory marketing and uneducated advice from acquaintances.

In order to overcome the temptation to jump on another quick fix, or to give up as soon as results are “slow”, you need to establish your Core Values.

This is such an integral part of my most successful client transformations.

This is the first step in my coaching program.

If you have never taken the time to connect your core values with your fitness journey, it could be the reason why most things never seem to work.